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If Polar Bears Could Vote

( Blogger’s Note—This is the second of my series “If Animals Could Vote.”  Please click here for a discussion of Crayfish voting.)

What if Polar Bears were allowed to vote? What would they ask for? How would they organize? Would they care for others or would they be selfish?

If Polar Bears were allowed to vote, the first thing they might do is insist on quick action regarding climate change. Many scientists fear that the ongoing melting of the polar ice caps will erode the Polar Bear’s habitat.

Polar Bears would also demand an end to Polar Bear hunting. Some whack jobs hunt Polar Bears for fun. Others for food and skins. With only 25,000 polar bears left in the wild, it would seem that all Polar Bear hunting should be banned.

The Polar Bears below have captured a submarine. This should even the odds with hunters.

Enfranchised Polar Bears living within the United States might well demand inclusion in the Marine Mammal Protection Act (MMPA). The National Audubon Society’s Guide To Marine Mammals Of The World defines Polar Bears as marine mammals. However, the MMPA does not currently list Polar Bears.

The Polar Bear’s Latin name is Ursus Maritimus. This means “sea bear.”

The MMPA extends a variety of protections to included species. (Though not full protection from hunting by native groups.) It is possible that if listed in the act, Polar Bears would then be granted “Majority-Bear” electoral districts to ensure Polar Bear representation.    

Below you see a Polar Bear flag. This flag is from a majority-bear district in Russia  where Polar Bear rights are strongly advanced.    

Polar Bears have also been known to practice so-called identity politics. Below is the flag of gay Polar Bears.

BEAR PRIDE FLAG 

It is good that Polar Bear diversity is acknowledged, but a more cohesive “pan-Arctic” view by Polar Bears might lead to faster and more complete rights gains for all Polar Bears. The recent move to a Polar Bear postal system as illustrated by the stamp below, can be seen as an attempt to join Polar Bears more firmly into one large community. 

Polar Bears have a lot to think about as they move towards the vote. One thing is certain though–No Polar Bear has ever been so misguided as to vote for Ronald Reagan or George W. Bush. Here’s hoping  Polar Bears will get it right and vote not just their own best interests, but vote in the best interests of others as well.

Here is some basic information about Polar Bears

July 23, 2008 Posted by | Uncategorized | , , , | 8 Comments

Colbert Nation Links To Texas Liberal Post About Animals Voting

Texas Liberal has been linked to by the Colbert Nation blog.

They linked to my post about if animals could vote. Click where it says “If Animals Could Vote” on the Colbert Nation link above.

They don’t mention the name of the blog, but I’ll take what I can get.

In Mr. Colbert’s discussion about the end of the primaries on his show last night, he says Democrats even had a primary where animals could vote.

It seems they may have gotten that line from my blog.

When will I figure out a way to make a buck from all this! 

June 4, 2008 Posted by | Blogging, Politics | , , , | 7 Comments

If Animals Could Vote—Crawfish Would Demand To No Longer Be Eaten

 

(Blogger’s Note—This is the first of an occasional Texas Liberal series called “If Animals Could Vote.”) 

With the Louisiana primary this evening, it is clear what crawfish would demand if they could vote.

(Yes–A crawfish is an animal.)

They would demand to no longer be eaten.

I don’t think we have to be able to read the minds of these creatures to know what they would want.

Yes–I do read their minds. 

Louisiana would be the lead battleground for the crawfish eating issue in the United States.

Given what must their very high numbers in ponds and streams, I think the demands of crawfish –or crayfish as they are also known–would be met.

If they only had the vote.

 

 Imagine if crawfish had a political party and a graphics staff. They might devise a logo such as this—

I feel all crawfish would rally around this banner.

Below is an Australian yabby crayfish

Here is the scary scientific name it has —Cherax destructor.

(Both the links above are very informative)

What would it demand?

Nothing. It is so happy with the recent defeat of far-right Australian Prime Minister John Howard, it feels there is little more it could ask.

Except not to be eaten!

Below is information about the crayfish from the Australian Museum online— (Maybe if we understand crayfish better, we will be more likely to see their problems) 

Crayfish belong to a group of animals called Crustaceans and are part of the phylum Arthropoda. Other Arthropods are insects (Insecta), spiders (Arachnida), and centipedes and millipedes (Myriapoda). All Arthropods have a hardened outer shell, called cuticle (made from calcium carbonate) that acts as a skeleton. Crustaceans are distinguished from the other arthropods by their two pair of antennae – an outer pair called antennae, and an inner pair called antennules. Crayfish bodies are divided into three parts; the head, the thorax (the section that contains the legs), and the abdomen (or the tail, which is the edible part of many large crustaceans including crayfish, prawns and lobsters). Crayfish, like many crustacean have a carapace or shield which projects backwards from the head and covers all of the thorax The carapace has two functions; firstly it protects the delicate feather-like gills which branch off from the base of the legs, and secondly it provides a water channel that is a constant flow of oxygenated water to pass over the gills and enables the crayfish to breathe.

Here is information about crayfish in North America.

Please visit this blog again for more ” If Animals Could Vote” posts.

February 10, 2008 Posted by | If Animals Could Vote | , , , , , | 12 Comments