Texas Liberal

All People Matter

Person I Shared Meal With Did Not Thank Busser For Removing Plate From Table

In recent weeks, I’ve had occasion to share a meal with someone at a restaurant, who, when a busser came to clear the plate for this person, did not say “thank you.” 

(This person was not the wife. Nor is it any elected official I have recently broken bread with.)  

Needless to say, when I saw this behavior I thought I had gone back in time to a barbaric age.

I notice this kind of thing. I think many people do. I bet the busser did.

Here is a link to Ms. Manners. Here is a link to Ms. Manners’ Guide To Excruciatingly Correct Behavior, Freshly Updated. It is a great book. I’m glad to say I’ve read it cover to cover.

If someone provides you a service—Please do thank them.

December 18, 2008 Posted by | Books | , , , , , | 10 Comments

A Starting Point For Rudeness

Much rudeness comes from the inability to quickly process any mildly unusual or stressful situation. People often lack the self-assurance to devise quick replies to the unexpected. Rudeness seems a better option than appearing silly or feeling awkward.  

March 18, 2008 Posted by | Uncategorized | , | Leave a comment

Bad Man Exits Elevator Before Woman Holding Ten Bath Towels

You’ll think I’m making this up, but just a few days ago I saw a man get out of an elevator before allowing the woman in the elevator to exit.

This was at a hotel in Corpus Christi, Texas. The man was from out-of-town, so his actions cannot be seen as a reflection on the good people of Corpus Christi.

It happened like this—

There were three people on the elevator. Myself, the bad man, and a woman hotel employee who was carrying maybe 10 bath towels.

We were all going to the lobby.

The elevator stopped at the lobby.

The bad man got off the elevator without a thought to the woman with the towels.

It’s one thing in a very crowded elevator, but when it’s a small number of people you let a woman out first.

Especially if she is carrying many thick bath towels.

Why let a woman out first?

Because it is polite–That’s why. Doing so suggests you were not raised in a cave. It is a small social courtesy that reminds us we live in a society and that the others sometimes come first.

I saw the woman move to get out of the elevator first. It was just the slightest movement towards the door.

She gave no visible reaction when the man bad man went out first. I’m sure she is acquainted with being treated poorly by guests at the hotel.

A measure of a person is how they behave when they have the choice to be either rude or polite– How they act away from home where nobody they know can judge their actions. 

It is good to be polite and it is bad to be rude.

It’s that simple.

March 17, 2008 Posted by | Lousy People | , , , , | 10 Comments

A Possible Response When Asked “How Is Your Day?”

We all get asked, “How is your day?” or ” How is your day going?” or some variation of that question.

It seems like throwaway type of question. Maybe in many cases it is meaningless. Still, it reflects basic courtesy and a realization that other people exist in the world. These are things we can’t take for granted in our society.

At some point I started to reply to this question with the response “Everyday is a good day.”

At first it was really just a line. But I got such a positive response from people I began to think about it more.

If I thought it was completely trite I’d stop using the reply. However, the sense I get is that people think about what I’ve said for a moment and it helps put whatever may be bothering them in perspective.

An underlying issue is death. People will often say something like—“That’s right. any day you wake up is a good day.” 

Black folks will often say: “I know that’s right” with an emphasis on the word know. Whites are a bit less emphatic,  but I’m still certain they are glad they woke up for the day.  

“Every day is a good day” is a small way to reply to a common courtesy that adds to people’s day and, also, makes you appear to have some insight even if you really have no special wisdom.  

And if you repeat it enough you might begin to believe it yourself.

October 31, 2007 Posted by | Things I've Done | , , | 2 Comments